Normally I am not all for being totally personal on the internet. I mean complete strangers read my blog so why would I want to hang out any dirty laundry? We are all supposed to be perfect right? No drama, no problems, no worries. Hakuna Matata right? Well that is not true and we shouldn’t act like that is how it is supposed to be.
I am human (in case you had doubts) therefore I make mistakes. Many of which I would like to forget but they are there. They will always be there no matter how hard I try to bury them. Some are good lessons and others just turned out to be an embarrassment. But to be frank I have not always had a Hakuna Matata life. Not because of my parents or other relatives but because of me. I made the choices that have led my life in the direction that it has gone.
But really thinking about it, I wouldn’t change anything I have done. Were some of them the best choices, no, but they were still my choices. If I hadn’t made them the good things in my life would never have happened. God worked it out that way for me. One example would be if I didn’t go through a terrible relationship then I would have never been pushed to go to college like I was and never would have met my husband. He is the best thing in my life and my most precious relationship I have. All the bad times are worth it in one handsome package of my husband.
The key though is not losing yourself just because you have gone through hard times. I have been learning this lesson lately. When I was going through my trouble stage, I was forced into becoming someone I wasn’t but when it was over in many ways I never knew how to go back. I was still me but there were pieces of me that hadn’t fallen away to show the true me underneath. I realized that writing has been a key to learning who I am not necessarily who I was. I am one in the same. I am who I was and who I will be. For scholars that should be a fun one.
As it is stated in “The Lion King” Mufasa says, “Remember who you are” when Simba is being led to go back to the pride lands. (I have been watching the movies I grew up with with my daughter so they are fresh in my mind.) He had grown up to be a really cool lion but there was a part of him that was still there even though he had grown up. It was his core of kingship. Which I think is still cool after all these years but that isn’t the point.
My point is that when you pick up an old habit, like writing for me, that might have happened before something drastic happened in your life,it might help you remember who you are. I am so happy I was pushed back into writing and getting published. Even with the current side road, it still will happen. I just need to be patient and remember who I am as a person. My name is Gracelyn, I love to write and I am an awesome person. The rest is in the past. I look forward to my future.