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As women, the hardest thing to do in marriage is respect your husband in everything, and I mean in everything. I can say that because I just had to exercise it recently. See, one thing about losing everything means that you have to replace everything, and, even with all of the gracious people in our lives, we still had to use a credit card to make it. So we have this card and other things from last year when we lost everything due to black mold in a rental hanging over out heads, and the dollar in California doesn’t stretch like… at all. So with one income and owning a house and debt, it can be tight at times to purchase anything big that wasn’t already budgeted.
They say that the number one reason why people fight is because of money and they are so right. This is the first time in our marriage where money has been a problem. Up until now we had been debt free and now we are like the normal American family. Big time sad face.
So the thing that made me have to practice again all the things I have learned about respecting my husband had to do with a rather expensive item that would add value to our lives except in the finance department. It would have put us in total about $4,000 more in debt, but I really wanted it. It would have been something that has been needed in this house we bought since simple things like vacuuming the carpet and changing out the air filter seemed to be beneath the previous owners. But we just couldn’t afford it.
Needless to say, when my husband told me this, I was and still am crushed. It’s hard being a season of the answer always being “no” and you wonder when the answer will ever be “yes” again, but it’s that time that you really grow. Let me tell you that I personally hate growing because it usually involves pain and irritation and I can see the Lord is growing me in the area of respecting my husband even when I 100% don’t agree with him. You can only imagine how hard that is for me since I wanted this amazing item so much but my husband said “no”.
So I have a choice. I could go the easy route and pout about not getting it, which is what I really want to do, but what really is the point. It’s hard enough on my husband the fact that his paycheck isn’t providing like it used to, and he doesn’t need me pouting and whining at what he can’t provide for me. No wonder depression in men are on the rise. They want to provide and work hard, but their circumstances make it hard (like 20% of your income going to taxes cough cough) they don’t need their wives complaining and being a constant reminder of their failures.
Which will I choose? I know which one I want, but it’s super hard right now. It’s hard to be told no. I guess I see that I can even have tantrums like my almost three year old. All I want to do is throw myself on the ground and say that my life sucks, but I know that isn’t true. I have been blessed with so much that I would need ten blog posts to write them all. So I wasn’t able to the get the thing I wanted. It doesn’t mean that I may never get it. It’s slim since my husband needs to get a car first but maybe when my daughter is out of the house… Oh I hope I don’t have to wait fifteen years to get it. That would suck I have to say, but I know that my husband is really only looking for all of our best interests.
I pray that God will give me the strength to do the right thing and respect my husband from being the leader of his home and being a good steward of the money that he does make. That includes not buying the things that he says no to no matter how much I want them.
Have you had a time where you had to submit and respect your husband? How did it turn out? Did God bless you for it? I could use a little but of encouragement in this area.
Until next time 🙂
Checking your Facebook every fifteen minutes? Feel like you never put your phone down? Yeah, that was me. I was realizing that I was on my phone all the time when I wasn’t taking care of my daughter. It was rather pathetic. Not only that but I was also getting angry at all the political stuff going on in America before and after the election. I’ll jut say that I am not a part of the protesting group so I get pretty annoyed. So I decided that I was going take a break from social media apps and see how it will affect my life. That means I only can be on Facebook when I am on a computer.
I have done it for one day and I can say that it has already enhanced my life. My daughter is happier already because I am not on my phone and we actually watched a whole movie together. My husband likes it since I wasn’t all pissed off yesterday at things that I really can’t change. And I was happier since my family was happy.
Is social media really enhancing your life or just adding stress to it? Why don’t you join me and not be on it so much and see how our lives are better for everyone. I’ll keep you updated on how it’s going for me 🙂
My husband and I just got back from a wonderful trip to Denver Colorado and then to Cheyenne Wyoming. It was our fifth anniversary this year and we wanted to do something fun and different, so we decided to leave sunny-ish California and go to the Rocky Mountains.
Our trip started bright and early at the airport where my husband and I looked forward to a restful trip where there weren’t going to be any timelines or deadlines to do things. We had no idea what we were actually going to do but we looked forward to whatever the trip brought us.
We landed in Denver a short flight later and we were ready to get going. After picking up our rental car, we searched for places to eat and found this adorable diner called Tom’s Diner. It was just the type of diner that should be in a movie. It was actually the type of diner I had pictured when I wrote my book, Potholes of Hope, which was fun too.
In total, if you are going to be in Denver, I would highly recommend this place. The people are friendly and the food is very yummy. You feel like part of the family as soon as you walk through the door. The prices are good and the quality of food is good as well. I certainly wouldn’t see the quality of food in a Denny’s that’s for sure.
After we ate, we Googled what to do in Denver and the Denver zoo came up. Since the weather was gorgeous, thought it was the perfect place to check out. It was amazing! Probably the best zoo I have ever been too. The selection of animals was breath taking.
These are just a few of the animals we saw. It was still chilly outside so the African based animals were mostly inside but we got to see some gorillas, elephants, and alligators too. This is another attraction I would highly suggest visiting if you travel to Denver. We lucked out for to not be snowing when we arrived but I think that this place would be even better in the summer time since all the animals would be out then.
But now it was time for us to drive up to Cheyenne where we were going to spending the most of our trip. There wasn’t any snow on the ground like I said so it looked a lot like home. When it really looked like Wyoming was the next morning. It snowed a good couple inches but it didn’t stop us from looking around the area.
Cheyenne is a super cute city. We went all around old town and Dell Range Blvd. and were very impressed. And the people are sooooo friendly! Being from California, we are only really familiar with rude people, and we can’t stand them. Of course we live in the northern part and people can still be rude. So Cal is were most of the rude people are. I would highly suggest no one go there unless you have to. We avoid it like the plague. But Wyoming, on the other hand, blew our minds.
We were interested in maybe moving there so we asked locals how they liked living there. It was amazing at how many people stopped to talk with us, and for a long time. They gladly answered our questions and were disgusted at all the stupid laws we have in California. My husband was impressed by the way they said that, even with the weather, they would choose Wyoming over anywhere. This impressed us to the point that we frown at the thought of going back to California.
So we just enjoyed the rest of our time because we shortly learned after we got back to the room that night was that both my husband and I get altitude sickness which would be a huge problem if we lived there. We thought maybe it would go away by the end of the trip but it didn’t so we sadly won’t be able to move to Wyoming but we highly suggest the state to anyone who wants to live in a conservative state. They are super gun friendly and it’s a no income tax state. The people are easy going and the housing prices are desirable. These were all the reasons we loved the state but above all the state is beautiful! We only have gone in the winter but I could only imagine the beauty that it is in the summer. Here are few pictures of our drive back to Denver to fly home.
Isn’t it pretty? Not the funnest thing to drive in but they do a great job in keeping the roads clear. We had very little black ice and the winds were low so the highway was an easy trip.
Overall, I loved Wyoming! I wish that we could move there and leave California but that doesn’t seem to be God’s plan for us. I am not sure why He wants us to deal with the horrible politics in our home state but He does. But, if you are looking for a good conservative state to move to, and you don’t get altitude sickness, and don’t mind snow, I would highly suggest Cheyenne Wyoming.
I know this is a reblog, but I felt like it was needing to be posted again. My little fireball is now almost three and we don’t have it all figured out yet. But I know that each day, by the grace of God, we make it through. So don’t see your strong will children as burdens but rather as a mission field. Use their energy toward the things of God. Because imagine what they could accomplish with the drive that they have? 🙂
It’s funny. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I had all these dreams and hopes of the person my daughter was going to be. I thought about all the pictures we would drawn and all the hide and seek games we would engage in. It was going to be perfect. There was just one thing that I didn’t think of. My cute, perfect daughter having a mind of her own.
Trust me, it’s not like I wanted a robot but my daughter’s personality is one that is a bit of a challenge for me. She is a super strong willed and stubborn child who makes the most simple requests (like don’t touch the blinds) into a big deal with yelling, screaming and me having to discipline her. If it was me as a child, the simple warning would have been enough. No not my child. For example with the…
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So here is actually a funny story for today. I know my posts lately have been about loss and sadness, but there is a lot of joy and good going on in my life. One of them happened yesterday even though they didn’t start out that way.
So yesterday my husband got our daughter ready to go since I drive him to work being we only have one car. I asked him does she have on pants and he said that she didn’t want to wear them, but he will put them in the car. We leave and I have to go to Home Depot on the way home and therefore Emma having pants was kind of a big deal. I grab the jumbled fabric that he said were pants and it was a long sleeve shirt. She of course already had a shirt, and I needed pants.
A little miffed at my husband, I go to Home Depot anyway and try to think about what I was going to do about my daughter not having any pants. Well, the Holy Spirit spoke to me in my heart and said, “It’s a long sleeve shirt. Put it on like a skirt and tie the sleeves in the back to keep it on”. It was genius!
Doesn’t she look cute with her skirt shirt thing? And everyone kept telling me that my daughter’s outfit was so cute as we walked through the store. If only they knew what kind of morning had led up to it. So, in the honor of that guy who now plays Bailywick in Sofia the First, I made it work 🙂