How to Cope With Change (Sort of)

I know that is a funny title but let me explain. I have been going through a lot of change in my life and now we are going through another huge change in our family and that is my husband is looking to go for Master’s Degree and we are going through the steps to find out why we can’t have another baby. It seems like once we get through one curve of craziness we are hit right into another one. So I thought I would share with you the things that help me cope with change. the (sort of) part is because I am far from mastering them.

  1. Prayer

When you are going through a tough period in your life you have to use prayer. These past few months have been something that I would never suggest anyone go through. Losing everything and then being treated the way we have by our offenders has been heart wrenching, but it has made me a better prayer warrior and a little bit more keen on shutting up and listening to God for change.

Prayer is sometimes the only weapon we have against our enemy. Like right now my husband and I are tying to decide whether or not to take legal action. I have been praying about it and the Holy Spirit has laid it upon my heart to not pursue them in court. My first reaction is “What the heck? God, seriously? They can’t be allowed to do this. They have put us in tough spot and now You want me to just let them off the hook?” It doesn’t seem right but the only answer that was given to me:

Romans 12:19   Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”

Ug! But I wanted to kick some good for nothing landlord butt! I wanted to be like a Ninja Turtle and go in there and show them that this is wrong and they can’t do it again. But I guess that isn’t up to me. Of course then I asked, “But Lord! What if they bring a case again us?” This is what He gave:

Psalm 5:10-12

10 Make them bear their guilt, O God;
    let them fall by their own counsels;
because of the abundance of their transgressions cast them out,
    for they have rebelled against you.

11 But let all who take refuge in you rejoice;
    let them ever sing for joy,
and spread your protection over them,
    that those who love your name may exult in you.
12 For you bless the righteous, O Lord;
    you cover him with favor as with a shield.

It’s through prayer and God that we will be protected. Of course it might not be His will that we will not be served with papers but if we are then God will lead us through.

2. Worship

I know that one of the hardest things for me to do when I am in the time of trial is to worship. Worshiping when I am in pain seems like the biggest oxymoron there is. But you know what? It is the best time to worship. Worshipping God in the middle of a trial is the best way to get back at the devil. The devil can’t stay in a place where God is being worshipped. So in that moment where I feel low, I reach for the radio, my phone or just search deep in my heart sing out to God. Most of the time I really don’t believe the words I am saying right in that moment but I know they are true and if I keep saying them then their truth will shine through.

3. Community

Don’t go through anything alone. Heck, God made woman because it wasn’t good for him to be alone and it is the same still for us. Going through a trial alone is like starting a fire in the middle of a rain storm. There isn’t any help and you end up going no where in your journey. You might be looking like things are going in the right direction but if there isn’t someone else there to shield you from the rain then you will never get your fire going.

I have some great people in my life to mentor me and be there for me. They listen, give in instruction, and correct me when I am wrong. Just because I am a grown woman doesn’t mean I don’t need a swift kick in the butt and I know my support circle does it out of love. I would honestly want them to tell me I am being prideful then having to have God step in for me to get the picture.

So I would suggest getting some good solid people around you that will point in the right direction. Yes there is a time to complain and mope but that isn’t how you get a fire going either. Having a fire starting party with two people trying to start a fire in the rain is just as unproductive and you trying to do it by yourself. So find someone or two who will challenge you beyond your circumstance. Find those people who will cover you in the rain and help you with your technique and maybe giving a couple of dry pieces of wood to get your fire going. I am thankful God has given me the women in my life both those who are still on this earth and those who have past to be with Him.

The Sort Of Part:

So I hope those couple of things were helpful to you wherever you are in life. These things aren’t just good in trials but for everyday life. And that is where the sort of part comes in for me. It’s still easy for me for be in close contact with God in the storm but when the sun comes out and things get better I forget these things and start to back off on them so when the next storm comes in am end up in the rain by myself trying to start a fire and I have to start all over again.

My hope as I grow and mature in Christ that I will have these things either with all the time or have them very close by so that I can call on them right away and my wood won’t get all soaked. So I challenge you to go out and do these three things. Feel free to tell me how it goes. I love to read the comments left by readers and if you need someone to talk to feel free to email me at gracelynswritingcorner@gmail.com. God bless!

Alive in Me

I love the lyrics of this song. I was listening to it in the car with my daughter today as we were running around doing our errands and it got me thinking – Do I really believe what this song is saying? I know that I am a child of God but I have always been taught that God is something that is out there and that He has control over everything in the universe. It wasn’t until recently have I been going to my current church that my pastor has been really talking about God living in us.

It is totally mind blowing to even think of such a thing. The almighty God, living in me. Wow! I am so not worthy and unfit to be a vessel of His but then I really hit that God – uses only “unfit” vessels because then He is the one who gets all the glory. If it was really up to me to do anything great in my life, I would be in a very bad place right now. Actually, I would probably be dead.

It is only by the grace of God that I have made it this far in life. He is the only reason that I continue to wake up in the morning. It is only through Him that I have the courage to do the things I do. I’ll tell you that writing this blog, publishing a book, and having an Etsy Shop is really scary for me. I have always been a very private person but lately it seems like God has been pushing me to come out of my shell. I am not sure He feels that I need to spill my guts out tho the world, but He does and I know better than to say “No” to Him. It is always easier to just do as the Lord leads than to fight Him.

So the question for me is, do I believe that God is alive in me? Yes I do! He is my rock and my fortress. I can hide in Him and I can stand firm with Him beside me. He has never left or forsaken me. Like a little broken child, I can come to Him and have Him hold me as I cry both tears of pain and celebrate with tears of joy. And, one day, I will get to meet my God face to face. I can’t wait, but, until then, I get to be here and enjoy the life He has given. I get to show other people that God truly is alive. He is alive in everything and He is definitely alive in me.

Feel free to comment 🙂

let them see you
Photo from Metrolyrics.com

Being Built the Way You are Meant to Be

Here is a deeper thought than I normally post. What if we are the way we are because that is who we are supposed to be? OK well, maybe not super deep at first. I am a heavier set girl and I have spent my whole life being told that I need to lose weight and change so that I fit into the BMI scale that is completely ridiculous. I’m 5’4” and according to the BMI scale I should weigh 140 lbs. I would never want to weigh that little. I know that most of my weight is my german hefty bone structure and 140 lbs would just look really bad.

Would I like to be about 175 lbs, yes but that would still put me as obese on the BMI scale. So according to modern medicine, when I am at my goal weight, I am still not good enough in their eyes.

Has anyone ever felt like that no matter how hard they worked, they were still not good enough in other people’s eyes? It’s not a very good feeling. It sucks actually. I have grown up being told that I am perfect in God’s eyes (which I am and I’m grateful for His love every day), but He isn’t walking down the street or sitting at the desk next to me on a daily basis in person. It’s the co-workers and the strangers and even family and friends who are there judging wherever we go.

And this doesn’t just account for weight even though that is a huge area women today deal with. A hundred years ago we hefty, hardy women would have suitors lining the streets for our hand in marriage since literally bigger was better. And not all men have that opinion that skin and bones is beautiful. My husband wanted a tougher girl because I would be able to “handle things” better. He also was “afraid he would break a small girl”. Grant it be that my husband is only 145 lbs. So he is not that big of a guy and he sees the beauty that not many people in a woman who doesn’t fit the image on Vogue.

But I said that that didn’t just apply to weight. What about our living situation? In the past few posts I have made updates about us moving to an urban area and I grew up in a town in the middle of no where with 2500ish people in it. I am a the girl that you hear mentioned in country songs but some how I feel in love with a “pretty city boy” and not a “fishin’ in the dark nitty gritty boy” as Canaan Smith puts it in his song I Wanna Love You Like That. My husband grew up in the urban area so this is no big deal for him to adjust. For me on the other hand, it’s interesting all the things that are different. I won’t go into those right now that is a another post for another day but lets just say that urban was never my idea as home.

I always saw it a where the poorer people lived or the people who were not as hard working as my family was because we had a small farm and did many things for ourselves. Obviously that is NOT TRUE, it is just a different lifestyle and God has decided that it is best me to come out of my comfort zone and join the land with lots of people and not as many trees. It’s His plan for me to be here and I think I will learn to really like it here. I have to say it is super nice having everything less than 15 minutes away 🙂

Where is my point in all this? My point is that life is not able to fit inside one little box and it never should be. Just because someone does something one way like wear their hair purple and short doesn’t make them wrong compared to someone who’s hair is long and natural. God is working on everyone in His own time and He knows exactly where He wants us to go. It might take us a few different tries but we will get there no matter what society says we should do.

And if you are still struggling with weight issues and no matter what you try the pounds just won’t come off, that is all right too because for some reason the weight might actually be good. I know that sounds backward but think about it. God has made you the way you are for a reason. Don’t worry or fret about the unwanted weight. Just keep working and soon things will turn around because God has built you right the first time just remember that. You are perfect in His eyes and He loves you very much. He wants you to be His child and to have a wonderful relationship with Him.

Because I am where I am meant to be and built to be what God wants me to be right now. What brought this on? It was actually from watching my husband build our dresser last night. Some parts went in easy and some not so much as shown in the picture below.

IMG_20151011_145243817

He had to use his fists multiple times to get the pieces to fit. They were all supposed to fit perfectly, as they were designed, but some just needed a little bit more help than others. When it was all done, the piece came out wonderful and just as it was supposed to be and we are the same. There is a master plan and, in the end, we will see the reason behind the handiwork God has set in motion.

A job well done.
A job well done.