So I think the word for us right now is change. There is very little stability when it comes to where we live and what we have. God has been throwing a lot of change at us and we can’t keep up with it. We have to get a lot of new things for the new house that we couldn’t take from the old and that has been a stretch for me. I am not that great with change to begin with.
Then I saw this on a walk went on with my daughter.
“He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.”
Can you see it? There is a new tree growing out of the dead stump. That is how I feel right now. I feel like the tree of my life with my husband, daughter and our stuff has been cut down to a stump. It looks ugly and dead moving into a new house with just our clothes and dishes. For once we don’t have enough furniture to fill a house. It is like when my husband and I were first married.
But then I am starting to see the life coming back. We have been super blessed by the people around us and slowly I can see the house filling up. It’s a little bit from here and little from there but at least it is what we need. I am so grateful for everyone in our life and that’s the important part. We are being a blessing to another person who is able to bless us. God is good, I know.
I am starting to get excited about the next move to the new house. Escrow should close in two weeks but the sellers have been able to stay for 9 extra days so it will be July before we can move in. So the move in countdown is now – 26 days 🙂
Man all I can do is applaud single parents. The longest I have ever had to watch my daughter without my husband present was four days while he was at a work conference. But now I have beat my record. My husband and I have had to live in separate locations for three weeks now and I have to say it is really tough. I won’t go into why we haven’t been able to be in the same place but I will say it has to do with our rental. The why isn’t important it is the fact that I have been a single parent for three weeks that this post is about.
I always knew that being a single parent was hard but this little taste has given me a whole new admiration for them. How they raise their children without losing their minds, I will never know. I miss my husband so much on a daily basis because everything depends on me. I mean as a stay at home mom I am used to having most of the stuff fall on my shoulders but I always knew that my husband would be home at 5:00pm to help me out. I would be able to finish the day with my partner. Well these few weeks have really been stretching me. I still have dishes on the counter and it is 9:00pm and they will probably stay there until tomorrow. I am not Super Woman and I don’t like to pretend I am. But it makes me think how single parents do it. They seem like super heroes to me.
So if you are a single parent I really admire you. Keep up the good work and know that it will all be worth it in the end. I do have to say though that I will be glad when this season of my husband and I being a part is over. I miss him so much.
Right now God is really testing me to see how I react to certain situations. Sadly, I am sure that I am failing. I know how I should react but that is not the way I have been reacting. Proverbs 15:1 says “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” I wish my first reaction to trials are soft words but more than likely they are harsh and full of unneeded emotion. The only good thing is that normally it is not directed at my husband. He is actually my sounding board and guide on how to look at the situation differently.
How do I change this? Well a lot of it comes with maturity. I am on the my early twenties and have a lot to learn so maturity is something that is still coming day by day. There are some areas that I am mature in and nothing can shake me, but then there are others that my leaves will fall off if someone sneezes by me. Right now, we are in a season that is sneezing my leaves off. I was strong in the beginning but now that it has been a few weeks with not much progress, I am starting to fade. I am starting to become mad at God for not fixing this thing in our path even though He isn’t the one that put it there.
I need to remember to be mad at the right person. Satan is the one attacking us, not God. God is allowing it because, for some reason, it works into His greater plan for us. He knows our lying downs and uprisings. He knows when a flower withers and feeds the sparrows everyday. He made the world in six days and I know He holds mine in place. I am not too little for God to notice me. I am His child and I need to trust Him.
So I will continue on even though this afternoon all I wanted to do was walk into the woods and never come back. I am overwhelmed and I am trying to keep it as a burden on my shoulders. I am trying to give it over to God and not take it back up. I am human though and I like to have control, but that’s not how this works. I must trust and then listen and then obey.
I don’t believe that commercials are “evil” but I do think that they mess with your head. How? Well what are commercial supposed to do? They are supposed to make up unhappy with what yo have been blessed with and want that thing that really you could mare than likely live without. For example: You have a working car that might be less than ten years old but you see the new shiny one on TV and you go and trade in your perfectly good (maybe even paid off) car for one that does the same thing. You put gas in it, turn the key, push the pedal and the car moves. Why exactly did you then buy a new car? Because the commercial you saw made you believe that you “needed” that new car.
That is the magic of the commercials and all the marketing that goes into them. Companies spend millions to have what happened to you happen. They don’t care that you don’t really need that new car, they just want to sell more cars. This is where I think commercials are evil and where a lot of our countries problem come from. Greed is HUGE in the world. If you think about it, most of the wars and conflicts in the past were over greed. Millions (maybe even billions in total) of people have lost their lives over greed. Now we don’t go killing people in our everyday life (at least I pray not) for the things we want. But there is still that root of greed that is in all of us to want that next best thing. You need the contentment weed killer to knock it out.
But how? Well there are some many options now for commercial free viewing. Our family uses Netflix but there’s Hulu and Amazon Prime and others that do the same thing. I have come to really enjoy no commercials because they are also very annoying. I don’t want to watch a 60 second blurb on a truck, I want to see what happens in my show! And using Netflix has done that. I can’t watch normal TV anymore since I can’t stand the commercials 🙂 But how can this help with greed?
It’s like my two year old, out of sight – out of mind. I don’t see all those messages every day so I don’t think about them. Plain and simple. I don’t see everything I am “missing” in my life because I only see what I have and I am thankful for it. Now don’t think that I am perfect at this. I still see things on billboards, ads, the internet, and those around me to have enough greed build up that I still want other things that what I have. But it’s more manageable. I can be more content longer this way.
Why don’t you give it try? I have no affiliation to any companies and have the worst product loyalty so pick who you want. Try it for 30 days and see if your attitude changes toward contentment. If, you are totally hard core, try no TV at all for 30 days. That’s really hard but I did that when we were fist married and broke and I found that I really didn’t care about TV it wasn’t that big of thing and I got a ton of stuff done. But every once in awhile a good veg session is needed for everyone 🙂
Comment below and let me know how it goes or any thoughts you might have on this topic.
People have said that to say “I’m sorry” is the biggest act to show how humble you really are. As a kid, I thought they were crazy but then I got married. Now I have only been married for four years to this date but I have already seen how the lack of saying “I’m sorry” can very quickly destroy a marriage.
I have a very “let’s fix right now” attitude and my husband is a “lets see how this rolls” kind of personality. Both are good in their own ways until we get in an argument. Then he shuts down and I don’t shut up. It turns into an ugly mess and we end up going in separate rooms where he is probably thinking I have gone insane and I am thinking that he is the worst husband ever. None of those things are true by the way, but have you ever felt that? They are both lies, actually anything in an argument said in anger is a lie, to get us off track with God and to have Satan get into our heads.
My husband and I one time had this fight where I thought that we might not work out in the long run because it seemed our goals were going in two completely different directions. I thought he was being lazy with life and I wanted to have more out of life. Turns out that wasn’t the case but it still didn’t stop me from mouthing off and not saying some nice things. MY husband was hurt and I was in no mood to apologize because I was in the right after all. If he wanted to “I’m sorry” it would have to come out his mouth.
Well it didn’t because he wasn’t the one who had to say it. If I have been rational, we could have just talked about my feelings of being taken advantage of and so on and the whole argument could have been by passed. He had no idea that was feeling the way I was and he would have been better if he had only known.
So guess what I had to do though before I could find that out? Yup, I had to swallow my pride and go say “I’m sorry”. I didn’t want to but God pricked my heart once I calmed down and point out how I was in the wrong. I needed to make the first step to making things right, not my husband. And when I humbled myself and said the magic words, the tension and anger melted away. So don’t give satan the satisfaction of getting in your head. Because it won’t end up in a good place for anyone.
Now this just doesn’t go for women, but also you men too. My husband has gone off on me for something that had happened at work and he had to be the one to apologize. And sometimes, it is the man who needs to be humbled and brought before God. No one is perfect and that includes men and husbands. Because you guys are the ones that Satan will want to get his foothold in the most. He know that if he can get a wedge between two people (especially a man a wife) then he knows that he can create a whole lot of trouble. He wants to have as much time as possible between apologies because that is where he can have fun.
But if too much times goes by where neither party is willing to say it, then that is where problems start. There’s a void that starts to open and it is not a good thing. Too much void means there will be opportunities for both sides to make bad decisions. I know that I have been presented a few and my husband even more when we are fighting. It is a scary thing to think of would happen to our marriage if one of us slips up just once. I don’t even want to think about it. So I have to remind myself daily to keep up the fight against the right enemy and that is not my husband. So do the easy thing and say “I’m sorry” and see the difference it makes in your life 🙂