Do you have PCOS? Do you have pregnancy symptoms but aren’t pregnant? Well I am here to tell you that you are not alone. I am a woman with PCOS and have these “episodes” too. My OBGYN thinks I’m crazy, my family thinks I’m crazy and even I was thinking I am crazy. And feeling very alone.
It all started for me when my husband and I were trying to conceive our first child. I was so happy since I was feeling pregnant our first month of trying. I waited two weeks and peed on a stick. Only I saw a big ol’ minus sign on the test. Devastated, I waited for my period but it didn’t come for another week and I thought I was going to die. The bleeding was horrendously heavy, the cramping were unbearable, and the clotting was alarming. It lasted for almost two weeks and then finally it was over. I thought for sure it was a miscarriage and according to my Google searches it was.
This happened five more times in a year and each time I was becoming more depressed and honestly and little neurotic. I tried working with my OBGYN, who is really awesome by the way, with blood tests, ultrasounds and any other test she could think of but all told me no matter how much I wanted to be I wasn’t pregnant.
So what did I do? I thought that if it was pregnancy that if my husband got a vasectomy these episodes would stop. Simple right? Well my husband was done trying for another baby since it was ruining me, our marriage and our lives so he went through with the vasectomy. For a little bit it seemed to work and then it happened again. I had my husband give a sample and it was clean. No sperm anywhere. So now I knew I was crazy and the vasectomy didn’t stop anything.
Depressing? Well I was pretty depressed. What was I going to do? Well, I am sorry to say that there isn’t any western medicine that can help us yet. I have tried and there isn’t a single answer there that will actually help. What I can tell you is that you are not alone and you are not crazy. I don’t know what causes these episodes other than it’s hormone related and of course PCOS does a great job of messing with them. But I can assure you that you are not crazy and you are not broken. There are more women out there like you and we stand in support. There are alternative things you can try but those you will have to do some digging with.
You are precious and you are strong. Keep searching for answers because someday some great woman is going to find a full answer that will change everything for everyone. So keep heart and keep your head up.