Where is She Going With This?

   Is it just me or does everyone around you seem like they have their life in order? Like the blessings just keep falling on them even though according to your tally sheet they shouldn’t? I know that is me right now and I am not even too proud to say I’m​ jealous of it. I know I shouldn’t be but there is that sting of seeing someone not live for God and have everything they want while my husband and I work hard and struggle to get back to where we were before the horrific year of 2016 happened. We live pay check to pay check and others seem to have so much money they don’t know what to do with it. I know exactly what they can do with it, but no one ever seems to offer.

   I happen to know quite a few people who could completely change our financial picture and they wouldn’t even notice the money was gone. It would mean everything to us but they just might have to actually write it down in an accountant book. But no one offers. No says “hey, I know you guys have really tried your best to get back what you lost. What is the amount you need to pay off the debt you have now due to your huge loss last year?”

   Now granted that people have offered us things and time which I am EXTREMELY thankful for because it would have put us farther in debt of we had to purchase those things too. One thing I do know is that if one more person says “oh, I’ll pray that the money issues work out for you” I am going to scream. Maybe you are the person God wants to use to bless us and you are refusing to do what He asks?

   Now this isn’t a plea for money (even though my dream is to receive a donation for our debt but let’s get real) but rather a post to open your eyes to those around you. I know that if I had the money to spend and knew the family was truly under a hard time and not habit then I would write them a check to help if not wipe out their debt. I would want to share the love and compassion in the aspect that so far hasn’t been extended to us. Maybe that’s why God keeps not blessing us right now in being able to pay off debt and rather just keeps laying down more issues in our lap? Our A/C died day two of the giant heat wave hitting the west coast so that’s really enjoyable at the moment with a toddler.

   Once again my husband and I are living separately with me at my wonderful wonderful parents and he’s home and getting rides from a wonderful wonderful friend to work so I can have our one car. It’s just another summer of hard life.

  So what is my point? Am I a victim? No since I can’t stand that mentality. What I am saying is that I am an example. There are others around you who could really use that spare cash burning a hole in your pocket. That is what Christians are supposed to do with loving their neighbor is help them out however they need and, if you can help someone, you should. You not only will be helping a family who will be thankful forever but you will be helping yourself in knowing you are showing what the hand and feet of Jesus look like.

  All in all be generous. Love your fellow brothers or sisters in Christ. You will actually reap the benefit more then they will. God bless 🙂

As We Grow As a Couple

Do you feel stuck where you are in your relationship with your spouse? Does it feel like you are still in the same place maybe financially like you were when you got married? I have to say that lately that has been the case for me. I look at our budget and think “man things looked better when we were first married and poor”. But were they?

When we pulled into church yesterday, I saw a cute couple cuddling in the guy’s car. They weren’t being inappropriate or anything. The girl was just leaning on the guy’s shoulder and he had his arm around her. It was actually really cute and reminded me of how my husband and I were when we were dating and first married.

The car the couple was in was older than me but they were happy. It got me thinking because when my husband and I got married, church mice were richer. We both worked but we were still in school and making minimum wage. (Depending on when and where you are reading this, that would be $9-$10/hour at the time.) We lived in the lower area of town and literally lived on love and kisses. Just like that couple was right now unless they are still living at home and then they don’t quite know what the real world is like.

Sometimes I still feel like that woman who is in the old car with nothing but my husband’s and mine’s dreams to keep the wheels turning, but am I still there? No. I am a home owner, we have a car with a 1 in front number of its age, we have a child, and he is now making more than double what he was when I met him. So why do I feel stuck?

Because honestly life sucks. We got dealt a really rough hand last year and we still haven’t recovered. We are still paying off debt that has happened and we will probably until next summer, but does that mean we are stuck? I hope not. Is it easy? No. We were setup how we were supposed to be financially until last year and now it has been blown to you know where. Will we get back there? Yes. I have hope we will.

How do I know that? Because we are not the same kids sitting in that old car living off love. We have experience now to where we can actually be the ones to give advice and encouragement. We have been through many things already and we still have many more in the future. It was just a nice reminder for me to see where we used to be so that I can see what I have now and be thankful for it.

Is it exactly what I want? No. Am I living in the area I really want to be in or have two cars like everyone else? No, but now that I have finally gone back to school I have a reason to power through it. I have a goal that I want to meet and it will keep me motivated along side remembering where we have come from.

Do you have some wisdom that you need to share about life and sticking with it? If so, feel free to comment below. I would love to hear from you.

Putting Respecting My Husband into Action

As women, the hardest thing to do in marriage is respect your husband in everything, and I mean in everything. I can say that because I just had to exercise it recently. See, one thing about losing everything means that you have to replace everything, and, even with all of the gracious people in our lives, we still had to use a credit card to make it. So we have this card and other things from last year when we lost everything due to black mold in a rental hanging over out heads, and the dollar in California doesn’t stretch like… at all. So with one income and owning a house and debt, it can be tight at times to purchase anything big that wasn’t already budgeted.

They say that the number one reason why people fight is because of money and they are so right. This is the first time in our marriage where money has been a problem. Up until now we had been debt free and now we are like the normal American family. Big time sad face.

So the thing that made me have to practice again all the things I have learned about respecting my husband had to do with a rather expensive item that would add value to our lives except in the finance department. It would have put us in total about $4,000 more in debt, but I really wanted it. It would have been something that has been needed in this house we bought since simple things like vacuuming the carpet and changing out the air filter seemed to be beneath the previous owners. But we just couldn’t afford it.

Needless to say, when my husband told me this, I was and still am crushed. It’s hard being a season of the answer always being “no” and you wonder when the answer will ever be “yes” again, but it’s that time that you really grow. Let me tell you that I personally hate growing because it usually involves pain and irritation and I can see the Lord is growing me in the area of respecting my husband even when I 100% don’t agree with him. You can only imagine how hard that is for me since I wanted this amazing item so much but my husband said “no”.

So I have a choice. I could go the easy route and pout about not getting it, which is what I really want to do, but what really is the point. It’s hard enough on my husband the fact that his paycheck isn’t providing like it used to, and he doesn’t need me pouting and whining at what he can’t provide for me. No wonder depression in men are on the rise. They want to provide and work hard, but their circumstances make it hard (like 20% of your income going to taxes cough cough) they don’t need their wives complaining and being a constant reminder of their failures.

Which will I choose? I know which one I want, but it’s super hard right now. It’s hard to be told no. I guess I see that I can even have tantrums like my almost three year old. All I want to do is throw myself on the ground and say that my life sucks, but I know that isn’t true. I have been blessed with so much that I would need ten blog posts to write them all. So I wasn’t able to the get the thing I wanted. It doesn’t mean that I may never get it. It’s slim since my husband needs to get a car first but maybe when my daughter is out of the house… Oh I hope I don’t have to wait fifteen years to get it. That would suck I have to say, but I know that my husband is really only looking for all of our best interests.

I pray that God will give me the strength to do the right thing and respect my husband from being the leader of his home and being a good steward of the money that he does make. That includes not buying the things that he says no to no matter how much I want them.

Have you had a time where you had to submit and respect your husband? How did it turn out? Did God bless you for it? I could use a little but of encouragement in this area.

Until next time 🙂

 

Oh the Irony in Life

I got an interesting letter in the mail today. I sort of freaked out because it was from Sutter Health and it looked like it was a bill. Here is the thing though, we paid off all of our bills two years ago to them right before my husband got his current benefits at his job. So I opened the letter and a second later started laughing my head off.

Let me give you a little back story. In December 2013 I came down with a nasty respiratory cold and it got so bad that I had to go to the ER. Mind you I was also five months pregnant with my daughter and had a fever that wasn’t coming down. So off to the ER we went and had the most horrific service I have ever had in the ER. WE were there for 7 hours and saw the Doctor for 10 minutes. They didn’t do an IV or anything. They simply called me crazy and sent me home. In the words of Michelle Tanner “How rude!”

After that we were slammed with a $1,000.00 bill from the ER room for no service and  and a $250 bill for 10 minutes with the Doctor who did absolutely nothing! Nothing! He got paid to tell me I was nuts. Any way, we wanted to protest the amount of the bill but with all the crap from Obama Care (thanks Obama), I didn’t want to get into a nasty medical case. So we were good stewards and paid the bill one $25 dollar payment at a time.

Why so low? Well…I had tried to settle with them on a lump sum but they wouldn’t take it. They wanted the full amount even if it meant that they got it $25 at a time. Once again, they were rude and uncaring. So we did just that for about eight months. Then we got enough to pay the full amount and did so just to get away from this system of terror.

Ok, now back to why I was laughing my head off. Turns out we over paid! Guess by how much?

That’s right, one penny! The stamp itself was $0.47. So they spent $0.48 in total. I would have honestly said keep the change but they have to by law send out any overpayment fees. So I did end up getting the last laugh. Needless to say, we are no longer with this group and now with a medical group who treated us like gold when my husband was recently there. You can read all about it HERE.

So if you are dealing with a medical fiasco, take heart. You just might get a check in the mail for $0.01 for two and half years ago and get the last laugh in the end.

A Normal Saturday

So this morning, I woke up with a huge list to do. Well actually every Saturday I do since that is the day for Emma will be distracted by my wonderful hubby until I am finished and I don’t have to worry about her. Any way, I woke up and started my bread for the week and get it rising, then I had to do the pizza dough for the next couple weeks to put in the freezer, then I had to make soup for the next two nights and get it in the crock pot, then the bread dough was ready to be split to rise again, then the I got to sit down for a couple minutes before they had to go in the oven, and finally I prepared sweet potato fries to go in the oven when the bread was all done. Whew! That was a busy morning.

Why am I bringing this up? It is not because I am bragging. Trust me, all I wanted to do was sit on the couch with my family and watch Tinker Bell for the 100th time, but I was instead in the kitchen all morning. The reason I did this was because it saved my family over $30.00 in products.

Each loaf of bread only costs $1.50 each (I made four) and in store they go for $3.00 a loaf. That’s $9.00 saved there.

The pizza doughs cost about the same and they go for $5.00 in the store (I made 3). That’s $10.50 saved.

The fries go for a small bag at the store $2.29 and I made enough to be the size of two of the bags. The bag of sweet potatoes only costed $1.79 to that was $3.00 saved there.

And with the soup, I used left over chicken from a chicken I had already made two meals out of, the veggies were already in my fridge and costed me all less than a dollar and I have bone broth in my fridge so I didn’t have to spend any money on chicken broth. If I had to buy it in a can, it would cots me at least $2 a can and I made enough to make five cans so $10 saved there.

In total that was $32.50 saved (before taxes that would be included on the purchased items), and all it costed me was a few hours this morning.

So for me it was worth it. That doesn’t even considering the health benefits from them being homemade but that is another post 🙂

Have you considered doing more home cooking but don’t think it is worth the time and effort? Well I can tell you it is. My husband and I are now saving for a house and retirement for the little areas that I can help save money will make a bigger impact later for us. And that to me is worth three hours in the kitchen 🙂

Hope you have fun in the kitchen and have a blessed rest of your day!

IMG_20160206_132740759
Anybody hungry?